The sprinklers had turned off and most of the snails had stopped eating lettuce and had pulled up inside their shells to go to sleep.
The farmer had gone inside for a well earned rest and to watch TV.
The guard dog had settled down outside his kennel.
All that could be heard was a distant owl.'Tawoot Tawooh, Tawoot Tawooh.'
One snail had not gone to sleep however. It was hungry and it crawled over the edge of the tray, down the leg of the bench and onto the concrete.
As it slid slimely towards the sleeping guard dog, it left a shiny red trail behind it.
The snail was a vampire snail looking for its next meal of blood.
It slithered up to the dog and carefully sank its fangs into the dogs neck.
The snail was not careful enough supping on dog blood however. The dog barked and howled until its owner came outside with his torch and looked all around. All he found was a snail crawling back towards the snail farm. He picked it up and placed in the cage ready for the next day's consignment of snails to restaurants all over France.
Now it just so happened that in Paris that day there was an important meeting of heads of state from all around the world. At lunch they went to a famous French restaurant beside the Eifel Tower.
The Honorable Julia Gillard, Prime Minister of Australia, was absent mindedly eating snails fried snails from her plate. She didn't notice the snail that left a red trail behind it slide across the plate towards her hand.
She popped it into her mouth and ate the vampire snail. It wasn't long after that that she grew pale, swayed in her seat and fell to the floor. An ambulance was called and, with a police escort, she was hurried to hospital.
She wasn't long in hospital. Everything seemed fine with her state of health and she was released the next day. Her private secretary was briefed by the doctor. They assumed it was her busy pace of life or something she had eaten but they had taken blood samples just in case.
"Look after her well," said the doctor, "We don't want any unpleasant surprises."
Julia Gillard flew back to Australia the next day and was met by the media at the airport but she would not talk about her hospital visit. "I am extremely well. Tomorrow night I will be debating with the Leader of the Opposition, Tony Abbot, about climate change on Q&A. I'm looking forward to it."
When Julia Gillard arrived at the television studios, Tony Abbot was already in makeup.
Her Press Secretary said, "Are you alright? You're looking a little pale."
The Prime Minister said, "I'm feeling a little hungry. I wish I had had something more to eat before I came."
The production manager came in and said, "Five minutes to start please." There wasn't any time for her to get anything to eat.
Tony Abbot was the first of course. He bounded into the studio and sat down but as Julia Gillard followed him in she seemed to be looking at Tony Abbot quite strangely.
And as the television camera panned over Julia Gillard the light seemed to gleam off her front teeth.
The first question asked by the Q&A presenter was, "Prime Minister Julia Gillard can you tell our studio audience why your government has cut funding to community organisations services such as the Red Cross and blood banks across Australia?"At the mention of blood Julia Gillard turned pale, stood up, swayed and fell towards Tony Abbot. Tony Abbot attempted to stop her from falling. He grabbed and held her up and in the confusion of cameras pointing everywhere and people in the audience screaming, nobody really saw that Julia Gillard had sunk her fangs into Tony Abbots neck and had taken a sip of blood.
By the time the confusion had ended she was back sitting in her seat and saying, "Now what was that question? I'm sorry. I missed out on tea tonight."
But do you know what? Tony Abbot was scratching his neck and when he lifted up his hand he saw blood on it. He was looking at the Prime Minister strangely. He looked again at the blood on his hand. He turned pale and fainted falling to the floor with a bang.
The Q&A presenter said, "We regret this interruption to our program but we will just switch to a prerecorded interview with the Leader of the Greens, Bob Brown. We will be returning to our debate between the Prime Minister and the Leader of the Opposition very soon."
The TV screen switched to an old interview. Tony Abbot was taken in an ambulance to the hospital and kept overnight. He released the next day but his Private Secretary was told by the doctors, "We think he is OK but we are a little concerned. When we analysed his blood there was something strange in it. Just be careful."
That night, the Prime Ministers Office got a phone call from Paris, France. It was a haematologist from the hospital where she was treated after eating snails in the restaurant beside the Eiffel Tower.
The Prime Minister's Secretary was told, "We have analysed what was in her blood and we've tracked it down to a snail farm where all the snails have turned into vampire snails."
"A dog that was on that farm was found at the foot of a tree that was a roosting tree for bats. We suggest you take emergency precautions."
The next night on the ABC there was an announcement. "We are just crossing to a news flash. Both the Prime Minister and the Leader of the Opposition have been taken away by ambulance to a secure hospital."
When reporters tried to interview either Julia Gillard or Tony Abbot they were told that interviews were no longer possible. Later that night a camera crew waiting on the lawn outside the hospital saw two strange forms flying away from the hospital. One of the bats had large ears and the other had red hair.
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